Just random thoughts late at night.

I'm moving to Florida in about two weeks!!! Ahhh!! Through the years I've dreamed of leaving PA, but now that it's almost here I can't really believe that I'm leaving. I don't like where I live, it's nothing personal...I've just never felt like I truly belonged here. High school was a nightmare for me. I'd come home crying and daydream about moving to New York City or California. I would plan in my head how I'd finally stick up for myself and I'd plan all the mean things I'd say to the bullies before leaving. Now that it's really happening and I'm really leaving to go fulfill all my dreams, I have nothing but nice things to say. I have no urge to say anything bad about anyone who has done me wrong through out my life.

I've come to realize if I had never encountered the mean people in high school, or that guy that broke my heart, or just a simple rude comment from a stranger, I wouldn't be who I am right now. I would have never had the confidence to apply for the Disney College Program. I would have never had the strength to chase my dreams. I would have never had the courage to want something else, something better, than this.

For the longest time I was super afraid to even admit I was bullied in high school, but I'm not anymore. I want to be able to help someone who might be going through what I went through. I want t0 let people know it gets better if you make it better. You are in charge of how your life turns out....don't let anyone else tell you otherwise. Don't let anyone tell you your dreams are dumb or unrealistic. That's bullshit. I know I might be judged because I've been bullied, but no matter what I do there will be people who judge. The people that will accept you are the people that are worth being friends with.

One of my favorite movies is Eat Pray Love staring Julia Roberts. That movie (and the book that I am still reading) truly inspired me. In the movie there is this scene where Julia Roberts is in India talking to a friend about her ex who she is still in love with and she says, "But I miss him." And her friend says, "Then miss him. Send him light and love every time you think about him. Then drop it." Yes that quote is about getting over someone, but you can also use it to get over anything else like past grudges or pent up anger. If you are angry at someone then be angry. Allow yourself to be angry at whatever that person did. Yet, don't say negative things back. I believe if you only send out negative things in life, you will only get negative things back. Send them "light and love" then fucking drop it. Don't dwell on the anger for days, weeks, or even years later. Holding onto the anger won't change anything. The point I'm trying to make is, I've let go of the anger I had been holding dearly for the people from my past. There is no point in packing it up and bringing it to Florida. Actually, you shouldn't even bring it with you into tomorrow.

I will never forget my past, but I refuse to be upset or angry over it ever again. I am so thankful for the good people I've met so far in my life. They helped me through the not so great times and made the great times even better!

****SIDE NOTE***So a lot has happened since my last post. Between the Holidays and getting a bad virus on my computer I haven't had the time or ability to post anything new. The virus was so bad that I had to completely wipe everything from my computer, so all the pictures I had from my bleaching experience are now gone. (I will be doing another post about how my hair turned out and what I did to get it to the blond it is now, when I have the chance to take new pictures)

How to: Go from dark brown hair to light blonde at home!

Now before I start explaining how I did it, I want to let you know my hair was not black. It was dyed with a dark brown SEMI-PERMANENT hair color. If your hair is black, or you have used a permanent hair dye on your hair, it might have different end results. If your hair is black, after your first bleaching it will turn red most likely; not a pretty red either. Most likely a blotchy dull deep red. And you will probably need 3-4 bleaches to get it platinum blonde...maybe more! (I went from black to blonde before, I would not recomend it!)

I also want to make it clear that I'm not a professional hair stylist. Just someone who has spent many years dying my hair almost every color you can think of. After my many experiances with dying my hair I picked up some knowledge about the topic, and just want to share it with you :]

I did a lot of research trying to find the products I used, and while researching I realized something: some people think when they buy a bleaching product at Walmart such as, Nice 'n Easy Born Blonde. The package says, "maxium blonding for even for the darkest hair." Which isn't entirly untrue, misleading yes, but certaintly not untrue. It will bleach dark hair, but you will not be as blonde as the pretty girl on the box if you start with dark hair.

Your hair will go through seven stages:

Now that we have a little background information, here is the process I went through.

The night before I put this stuff in my hair, put a cap over my head, and slept with it on. It's amazing, and will leave your hair super soft and stronger. I would only use this if you have naturally dry hair, or if your hair is brittle from striaghtning, curling, or chemically processing it. Otherwise it'll leave your hair oily. I got it at Walmart for only $2.00!!! Wowzers!!

This is the color of my hair when I dyed it with the semi-permanent hair color. It wasn't THIS dark in real life, actually. This picture was taken at night with a not-so-great-webcam. But, it's the only picture of myself I have with this haircolor.

Now, the with the first bleaching I used Clairol's Nice and Easy Born Blonde (Maxi). I used this because I hadn't done a ton of research. I basically went Walmart looking for a new bleach to use. In the past I used a bleach from Herbal Essence (which was AMAZING) Unfortunatley I think it was discontinued. I can't find it anywhere! The only reason I tried this was because the box said it will lighten even dark hair. It wasn't a bad product. But I would suggest using the bleach I used for my second bleaching. I will explain that when I get to my second bleaching experiance.

Anyway, my hair turned a bright orange. I wasn't expecting to get it blonde so I wasn't too freaked out. I didn't take a picture, but it was basically this color:

I was prepared for orange or brassy hair, and had bought a semi-permenant hair dye when I bought the bleach. (Semi is a lot less damaging and will be less difficult to lift than a permenant dye) Look for one that says "cool" or "ash tones." Ash tones will minimize the apperance of brassy hair. If you buy a "warm" color it will only make your hair even more orange. The reason why I didn't go ahead and bleach it again was because I wasn't 100% happy with the bleach product I used, and I didn't want my hair to fall out. Before I bleached it the second time I spent days deep conditioning and using the LeKair product I showed above to put back moisture in my hair. Even after I used the ash toned hair dye, my hair still had an orange cast to it when I was in bright lights or the sun. The ends of my hair were a light brown orangey color. Yes, I went to work and school like that.

Tonight I did the second bleaching with a product called Beyond the Zone Radical Bleach Kit. I went with this bleach kit because: 1. I heard amazing reviews about it. and 2. It was affordable ($8.99) If you have the extra cash, get L'OREAL's Quick Blue bleach instead. It's $25 and you have to buy developer as well, so it's a little pricey. The only bad thing about the Beyond the Zone bleach is, there's not enough to do your whole head if you have long hair. I bought two kits.(The kit is actually ment for highlights or chunking) It comes with everything you need, including a brush to put it on with, so it's worth buying two for $18. **Caution: This bleach has 40 volume developer, so it is very strong. It may cause a lot of damage to your hair. So do a strand test so you know exactly how long you should keep it on your hair.

After I did my strand test, I parted my hair in 4 different sections and put the bleach all over my hair, except my roots (about one inch from my head) Your roots will lift much faster than the rest of your hair. If you apply the bleach all over your head, your roots will be much more blonde then the rest of your hair. By the time I was done with that, a lot of time went by so I immediately started putting it on my roots. I left it on for maybe, five minutes at the most, then washed my hair with a moisturizing shampoo. The total time i had it in my hair was 30 minutes and it lifted all the color out. Some parts were a pale yellow, and parts were a very bright platinum blonde color.

Have to go o bed now, I'll post the rest tomorrow :] Goodnight!

Starting My Journey!

Okay, so I forgot I ever made one of these. But apparently I did two years ago. I want to start this blog so I can kind of document my experience working at Disney. Mostly for something I can look back on and remember my memories that I will have there, and also for anyone curious.

Last week I was accepted into the Disney College Program! Which is basically a paid internship. I applied some time in October and seriously expected to not even be considered for a phone interview, because that's the story of my life haha. During the phone interview I was SO nervous! I was shaking, stumbling over my words, and rambling every time I answered a question. The lady who interviewed me was super, super nice! She made me feel comfortable, and even laughed at the dumb jokes I was making. So, if you are considering doing the program don't stress about the interview. Here's some advice though, be prepared to tell him/her your top three jobs you would like to be hired for, and know why you want to do them. To anyone who is currently on a pending list waiting to see if you got it or not, don't give up hope! I was on a pending list since the beginning of November. I was starting to think I wasn't going to get it, I even registered for spring classes at my college.

So, this blog isn't going to get that interesting until I'm actually in Florida, then I will be posting pictures and stuff about all the things I do down there. I'm thinking about doing other posts that aren't Disney related, since sticking to one topic isn't my thing. I need randomness in my life :]